Ooh, we’ll put bacon on everything! Now we’ll cover everything in avocado! Artisanal coffee! Brunch has been forever taken over by ridiculous trendy food This makes no sense.īrunch is all about the eggs. Mimosas and bloody marys are allowed, but it’s frowned upon to ask for a mojito or tequila. And there seems to be a weird judgement-based system on which drinks are acceptable at brunch You either have to keep drinking until bedtime or stop post-brunch and deal with a slight headache and blurry vision for the rest of the day.

Boozy brunches mean you’ll be tipsy by 12pm, which will knock your whole day off balance Making someone choose between bacon and waffles is cruelty I just can’t accept. You have to make the horrible choice of sweet or savoury, and you will regret your choice either way THIS IS NONSENSE AND WE SHOULD NOT ACCEPT IT.ġ0. All the food is overpricedīasket of toast with selection of jams: £5. No one should have to wait forty minutes for the honour of sitting elbow to elbow with other brunch addicts while eating an overcooked poached egg. Now anywhere serving up some mushed avocado on toast is fully booked up for the next three Sundays.īen & Jerry’s drops new lemon and honey flavour co-created with refugee entrepreneurs 8. It used to be the case that if you wanted to try a cool new restaurant, you’d just book in for breakfast, when everyone else is at home eating their cereal. Especially because every brunch place is massively overbooked No one has ever set up a brunch date with a group of friends in under five minutes.

Organising brunch with friends is a massive load of faff And yet SO MANY PLACES have ridiculously strict cut-off times There has been no official definition by any legally recognised brunch board, and this makes me deeply uncomfortable. Some people believe that the window extends to 4pm. Some people appear to think that eating eggs on toast at 10am counts as brunch. There’s no clear definition of when brunch actually is OH, so you think you can sneakily take away one of my mealtimes by combining two with a catchy name? Not on my watch.Ĥ. You’re being cheated out of a meal, and that’s not okay It’s stressful and confusing and I’m done with it. Are you supposed to have another snack between brunch and dinner? Do you have to move your dinner time forward a few hours to avoid a window of hunger and despair? You’ve had an early lunch that’s really just breakfast. London’s top 16 brunches by some of the city’s favourite food instagrammers And then after brunch, your entire mealtime routine is all messed up You can’t have breakfast AND brunch, so you have to wake up at 9am (being a working adult has ruined your natural lie-in tendencies) and slowly grow increasingly hungry and tetchy until the agreed brunch meeting time of 1pm.

Im done with brunch ill always